These Days

On July 28 we hit the 6 month mark since Quinn left us. The days leading up to that Thursday were really emotional for me. I could cry at the drop of a hat or the slightest mention of anything. Luckily, I was working that day, which served as a good distraction. A couple friends sent me poems or quotes which had me hiding in the bathroom crying for a little bit, but I managed to pull my act together. I am not quite sure what made the 6 month mark so extremely hard for me. The 28th comes and goes every month but there was something about 6 months that was so hard to swallow. A half of a year has gone by. We should have a happy, healthy, 6 month old little girl. We all know what we have instead. I spoke about this with my friend who lost her little boy last year. She told me 6 months was harder for her than the year mark. I found some comfort in that.

I think one thing that I worry about as time wears on is that people will forget about Quinn. I had a coworker tell me his brother had a stillborn due to trisomy 18 years ago and that when his brother mentioned the name Isabella recently, he said “who?” Thanks, just what every loss parent wants to hear. I actually wished in that moment that I could have seen what my face looked like. I was semi-appalled that someone would say that out loud to me. He quickly followed it with, no one holds it as close to them as the parents. Again, thank you. I am terribly aware of that. What has been nice was having two separate friends ask me for pictures of Quinn. I also went to a friend’s house the other day and Quinn’s prayer card was on her refrigerator. Small things, but so important to me because that is literally all we have. 1 day, technically 4 hours, to create the only memories we will have for a lifetime.

I will leave you with a poem that was sent to me on the 28th, it made me think of all of the little ones who have left us too soon….

poem

8 thoughts on “These Days

  1. I’m so sorry about you hitting the six month mark. I have two more months to get there, but I’m dreading it. I’m glad you had support going through the day!
    I was absolutely shocked when I heard the story your coworker told you. Just know Quinn will never be forgotten. She is so loved by you and you’re keeping her memory alive.
    Sending you so many hugs and love.

    Like

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